Become friendlier and succeed bigger is a concept that most people miss completely. And yet it’s a critical factor if we want to succeed at a higher level. Dale Carnegie, in the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” said that there are all kinds of courses in ordinary schooling. However, he was not aware of any courses on how to get along with people and how to express a friendlier personality. Thus, he created such a course and, to this day, it is taught worldwide with amazing results. I personally took The Dale Carnegie Course years ago and benefited greatly from the simple, but life-changing concepts that I learned there. The Carnegie book describes 9 points that could help any of us become friendlier:


Become friendlier and succeed biggerOur ability to create great relationships is at the heart of success. Carnegie said that if we want to put the nails in the coffin of any relationship, we should criticize, condemn, or complain. And, he further stated, most fools do just that. He tells about notorious criminals like Al Capone and “Two Gun Crowley” and the fact that they didn’t criticize themselves. In fact, Al Capone, the gangster, felt that he gave people “the lighter side of life.” He believed he was a public benefactor. He didn’t blame himself for anything. Thus, what about the people you and I deal with every day? They usually don’t blame themselves for anything and often defend their actions.

If you feel strongly about criticizing someone, or complaining about something, Carnegie suggested that you do what Abraham Lincoln did when he was upset with a general during the Civil War. Lincoln wanted the general to attack a Confederate force at an opportune moment. The move could have shortened the length of the war. The general did not attack. Lincoln was furious. He wrote a detailed critical letter to the general expressing his dismay. What did the general do when he got it? Nothing. Lincoln never sent it. It was found in his records years later. Thus, if you feel like criticizing, condemning, or complaining, write a detailed letter to the person and put it in a drawer for a few days. Chances are you’ll never send it and you’ll save yourself a setback toward bigger success.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger means giving honest and sincere appreciation. Carnegie said that people perform at a much higher level when their efforts are being appreciated. Carnegie related that John Dewey, one of America’s most profound philosophers, said that the deepest urge in human nature is the desire to be important. He said that “This desire makes you want to wear the latest styles, drive the latest cars, and talk about  your brilliant children.”

Carnegie further stated, “It is this desire that lures many boys and girls into joining gangs and engaging in criminal activities. The average young criminal, according to E.P. Mulrooney, onetime police commissioner of New York, is filled with ego, and his first request after arrest is for those lurid newspapers that make him out a hero. The disagreeable prospect of serving time seems remote so long as he can gloat over his likeness sharing space with pictures of sports figures, movie and TV stars, and politicians. Thus, when you give honest and sincere appreciation, that makes people feel important and escalates your success.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by being aware that the only way to get people to do what we want is by focusing on what other people want. Carnegie said, “Why talk about want we want? That is childish. Absurd. Of course, you are interested in what you want. You are eternally interested in it. But no one else is. The rest of us are just like you: we are interested in what we want. So, the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.”

Carnegie also said, “Remember that tomorrow when you are trying to get somebody to do something. If, for example, you don’t want your children to smoke, don’t preach at them, and don’t talk about what you want; but show them that cigarettes may keep them from making the basketball team or winning the hundred-yard dash.” Thus, if you want to become friendlier, and gain greater success, look for the reasons of why the other person might want to do that which you desire.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by becoming genuinely interested in other people. Carnegie said that the people who cause the most harm are those who aren’t interested in anyone but themselves. A study by the New York Telephone Company showed that the word most frequently used in phone conversations was the word “I”. It was used 3,900 times in 500 telephone conversations. Carnegie stated, “When you see a group photograph that you are in, whose picture do you look for first? If we merely try to impress people and get people interested in us, we will never have many true, sincere friends. Friends, real friends, are not made that way.”

Carnegie declared, “If we want to make friends, let’s greet people with animation and enthusiasm. When somebody calls you on the telephone, use the same psychology. Say “Hello” in tones that bespeak how pleased you are to have the person call. Showing a genuine interest in others not only wins friends for you, but may develop in its customers a loyalty to your company.” My mother was genuinely interested in other people and that was reflected in the success of her business. She said that everybody’s got a story and she felt she could learn something valuable from everyone she met. It’s no wonder people liked her so much!


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by smiling more. It takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown. And yet, it appears that many people make the extra effort to frown. It’s no wonder people don’t consider them friendly. Carnegie talks about Charles Schwab, the man that Andrew Carnegie made the president of U.S. Steel many years ago: “Charles Schwab told me his smile had been worth a million dollars. And he was probably understating the truth. For Schwab’s personality, his charm, his ability to make people like him, were almost wholly responsible for his extraordinary success; and one of the most delightful factors in his personality was his captivating smile.”

Dale Carnegie further related, “Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, ‘I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you.’ That is why dogs make such a hit. They are so glad to see us that they almost jump out of their skins. So, naturally, we are glad to see them.” If you’re not used to smiling a lot, just experiment for one week. Make a concerted effort to smile at 5 strangers every day. Watch how much friendlier other people will be to you because you’re going to be friendlier to them.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by remembering people’s names and calling them by name. Carnegie said that the most important thing in life, to all of us, is our name. Otherwise, why would someone give a fortune to have their name put on a building that will last much longer than their life? Carnegie stated, “This policy of remembering and honoring the names of his friends and business associates was one of the secrets of Andrew Carnegie’s leadership. He was proud of the fact that he could call many of his factory workers by their names, and he boasted that while he was personally in charge, no strike ever disturbed his flaming steel mills.”

When texting, other than to a family member or close friend, may I suggest you always use the other person’s first name and sign with your name? The same goes for e-mails. When meeting people, repeat their name several times. The repetition will solidify their name in your mind and it will make them feel important. Mention the other person’s name several times in phone conversations and watch what a better reception you get to whatever ideas you’re sharing.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by being a very good listener and encourage others to talk about themselves. God gave us two ears and one mouth. Maybe we should look at these proportions. However, these days, with all of our electronics, who’s paying attention to anyone? Thus, the person who is an active listener, really paying attention, is considered to be friendlier and given more respect. Carnegie stated, “What is the secret, the mystery, of a successful business interview? Well, according to former Harvard president Charles W. Eliot, ‘There is no mystery about successful business intercourse… Exclusive attention to the person who is speaking to you is very important. Nothing else is so flattering as that.”

My mother, who I mentioned became very successful in business, literally had air brakes on her words. She listened very intently. Thus, if she felt the other person wanted to say something, she would stop talking and say, “What were you just thinking?” With her gentle and caring tone of voice, everyone opened up to her. And, if they had a different point of view, she gently said: “Tell me more.” She was interested in other people’s viewpoints and said: “I can learn from everyone I meet.” She also realized that the person controlling a conversation is not the one who’s talking. It’s the one who’s asking the questions.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by talking in terms of the other person’s interests. Of course, you and I are much more interested in our own interests. So are the other people. Thus, if we want to escalate our success, let’s put ourselves in their shoes and talk about their interests.

Carnegie related, “Everyone who was ever a guest of Theodore Roosevelt was astonished at the range and diversity of his knowledge. Whether his visitor was a cowboy or a Rough Rider, a New York politician or a diplomat, Roosevelt knew what to say. And how was it done? The answer was simple. Whenever Roosevelt expected a visitor, he sat up late the night before, reading up on the subject in which he knew his guest was particularly interested. For Roosevelt knew, as all leaders know, that the royal road to a person’s heart is to talk about the things he or she treasures most.”

As a professional speaker, I’m very aware that my presentations go much better when I get a lot of audience members to talk. I ask a lot of questions and poll my audience regularly. I tell people that I’m not really a speaker. I’m a facilitator. I’ve come to get them to talk. I guide the process with my questions and then I get them to participate. Thus, I find that this process gets me much further than if I had simply come to lecture. I also find that I succeed bigger when I make other people around me shine. By talking in terms of their interests, I come across as being much friendlier.


Become friendlier and succeed biggerBecome friendlier and succeed bigger by making other people feel important. Carnegie said that we don’t ‘want’ to feel important. He said that we all ‘need’ to feel important. He also stated that “people will do more for a feeling of importance that they will for money!” I’m thinking that if I throw enough money at a situation, surely it will fix it. Not if I mistreat you. You’ll eventually have had it with me. Carnegie further related, “The unvarnished truth is that almost all the people you meet feel themselves superior to you in some way, and a sure way to their hearts is to let them realize in some subtle way that you recognize their importance, and recognize it sincerely. Remember what Emerson said: “Every man I meet is my superior in some way.”

If you don’t do this regularly, and realize how much of a shortcut this could be to your greater success, may I suggest that you make a sign that sits on our desk where you can see it every day: EVERYONE IS IMPORTANT! Look at it every day and soon you will be making other people feel important. Do it sincerely and watch what others will do to help you achieve great things.


“I follow Dale Carnegie’s ideas to become friendlier and thus I succeed bigger!”

Related Article: Sell Yourself to Others

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Copyright 2017 by Boaz Rauchwerger


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Why sales training is so important.

Why sales training is so important is an interesting topic. Some people think that the word “sales” is a bad word. However, if you think about it, we’re all involved in sales from the time that we’re born. A baby cries when it’s hungry. By doing so, it’s selling its mother the idea that it’s time to get fed. Did you ever see a child walk into a grocery store with its mother and keep saying, “I want a lollipop”? The child will keep saying that phrase until it sells the idea. Soon, the child is licking on one.

When we’re teenagers, we may sell our parents on the idea that we get to use the car to go to a dance. Couples sell each other on ideas ranging from where to live to how to manage money and where to vacation. We sell people on our idea when we start a business or sell a supervisor on the fact that we should get a raise.

Thus, some form of sales training can only help us focus more on what we want in life. In this article, I want to focus on sales training as it pertains to a product or a service. If you want to improve your success in sales, the following steps could help you gain more confidence and better results.


Why sales training is so important.Why sales training is so important is clarified in an amazing book. Dale Carnegie, in the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, said that people are creatures of emotion rather than logic. And that they will do things for REASONS and not for logic. Thus, if you want to excel in sales, we have to identify an exciting reason for you to excel in sales. It’s got to be more than food, shelter, and clothing. Those things are important, but not exciting.

Napoleon Hill, in the book “Think and Grow Rich”, said: When the WHY is exciting enough, the HOW doesn’t matter. The WHY needs to be a reward, something fun you would do just for you. Not something for your spouse or for your family. Something just for you. You’ll do more for everybody when you do more for you.

If you keep putting off something you’ve wanted for a long time, after a while you get depressed. The bottom line, when we’re all honest with ourselves, is this: What’s in it for me?

Thus, I suggest you get a picture of something you want that, with some effort, you could afford in a few months. It may be a new set of golf clubs, tickets to a special event, a weekend away, a new car – whatever. Get a picture of that reward, about the size of a business card. On the other side of the card, print some positive affirmations such as:

Everything I touch prospers and succeeds. I’m a very confident, talented, and successful person. I earn at least _______ per month as a sales leader. I’m getting (whatever your reward is) and I am excited.

Whatever other traits you may want, add them in the form of an affirmation. Print out the affirmations on a card about the size of a business card. Put the picture of your reward and the affirmations back-to-back, go to Fedex Office, and have that laminated. Then, read your affirmations out loud the first thing each morning and the last things each night. And, each time, look at your picture. Don’t analyze what’s on your card. Just read your affirmations with conviction and look at your picture. Watch what wonderful things are about to happen in the next 90 days!


Why sales training is so important.Why sales training is so important shows up in public speaking. To excel in sales, it’s important to gain confidence. Your ability to get up and speak in front of people is a shortcut to your greater success. That also builds great confidence. Thus, I suggest you either join a local Toastmaster group or take the Dale Carnegie Course. In both of these situations, you’ll work with other people who also want to gain confidence in front of people and they will encourage you.

In order to excel in sales, we have to realize that buying decisions are often made in the initial seconds that we meet with a buyer. Thus, we have to make every interaction with buyers count. They can tell very quickly if the salesperson is a confident person or not. These days, buyers have a lot of options and very little time.

Thus, being able to speak confidently in front of a group of people will translate to being confident in front of one person. Many years ago, while in college, I took the Dale Carnegie course. I believe that the valuable lessons I learned in that course have been responsible for my success in sales and as a professional speaker. Not only was it a great program for speaking confidently in front of others, but it was also a great course in human relations, dealing with other people, looking at things from the other person’s point of view, and becoming an exceptional listener.


Why sales training is so important.Why sales training is so important means talking less. In my many years of being a speaker and trainer for sales teams, I’ve come to realize that salespeople talk too much. I find that an excessive amount of sales training, that teaches people all types of closing techniques, results in salespeople talking too much. They apply those closing techniques, hoping to use the right one to get the sale.

I have found that the person who controls the conversation is not the one whose talking. It’s the one who’s asking the questions. God gave us two ears and one mouth. Maybe we should listen twice as much as we talk. I have also found that people would rather buy than be sold. Thus, if we let them do most of the talking, they may talk themselves into buying.

A good question to begin with, in a sales situation, is: “What is your toughest challenge concerning __________?” Then, as they talk, take notes. And not electronically. If we take notes on a phone or laptop, they can’t tell if we’re really taking notes or checking our email. Take notes on a notepad. Dale Carnegie, in the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, said that the greatest honor we pay anyone is RAPT attention – complete, total attention. Taking notes on paper, when a customer talks, pays total attention to them.

Then, when presenting a specific product or service, give the basic benefits of it and then ask, “What do you like best about this?” Let that person come up with the benefits and thus persuade themselves. And, if the product is not perfectly suited for the buyer, ask them: “What could we do to improve this product or service so it would work perfectly for you?”

It’s valuable to let a buyer come up with a solution. Then, when they do, they will fight for their own ideas.


Why sales training is so important.Why sales training is so important focuses on relationships. The most successful salespeople are the ones who create great relationships. I have found that those who do best in sales are genuinely interested in other people and that becomes the focus of their sales process. They’re not the ones who know the most about their product or service. In fact, they often rely on others at their company for the technical details. They are simply very good at creating great relationships and getting other people to like them. Unless price is the definitive point of purchase, I believe that people buy from people they trust and like.

The most successful salespeople realize that everybody’s favorite topic is THEM. Thus, they let the prospects talk about themselves. They know how to get conversations started by asking questions that the other person will enjoy answering. Questions such as the following:

Where are you from originally?

(If not from here) What brought you here?

(If from here) Have you lived here all your life?

Do you have a family?

What did you want to be when you were growing up?

A natural way to lead into some of these questions, when meeting in a prospect’s office, is to notice family pictures and ask about the people in the pictures. And, as the prospect answers the above questions, make note of the answers so you can refer to them in the future.

Use short notes, on hand-written cards, to further create great relationships. Don’t use notes with a company logo. Just get blank cards with a design on the cover, including your business card behind the card, and they may think that you picked it up just for them. Have no return address on the back of the cards, mark the word “Personal” on the lower left corner so it will bypass gatekeepers, and use commemorative stamps. Keep a supply of these handy and use them immediately after leaving a prospect’s office.

Why sales training is so important? Because, without some specific ideas to give you an edge, you won’t achieve the success you desire from sales. The ideas above are not covered in traditional sales training programs. However, they have been proven to be highly effective and make you stand out from the crowd.


“Everything I touch prospers and succeeds. I have identified my next reward, am taking a public speaking course, am a very good listener, and I create great relationships.”

Related Article: Create a Great Sales Team and Profit

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Marketing Ideas Lead to More Sales and Bigger Profits!

Marketing ideas lead to more sales and bigger profits are valuable in any industry. The following 10 are highly productive and have proven to be very effective and profitable for people in my audiences around the world. Some have led to profits in the millions of dollars! The best part is that none of them cost much money.


10 marketing ideas.Call the local television stations, radio stations, newspapers, and business journal in your area. Tell them that you’re sick and tired of hearing negative business news. Tell them that your company is doing great and that you think they should come out and interview you. What if someone says “yes”? You might even contact national TV networks such as CNN and see what happens. You’ll be helping the reporters do their jobs, which is to get new stories.


Discover 10 Marketing ideas.Identify 10 companies that you would like to have as clients. Identify the CEO of each of those companies. Send a one-page hand-written letter, with your business card, to each of those CEO’s stating: “With our experience in X, Y, and Z (your 3 best services), I think we could be of service to your company. I’d like to set up a meeting for coffee.” Send these letters once a week, every week, on the same day, by Fedex, until they call. You could send these on a Wednesday for third-day delivery. They won’t know it’s not overnight and you’ll save some money.

The fourth week, for those who haven’t responded, start adding some yellow Post-It Notes, handwritten. One should say, “I’m sure glad you finally opened this.” Another could say, “Aren’t you impressed with how I got your attention?”

In the seventh week, for those who haven’t responded, send a new baseball in a little box with the following Post-It Note: “I’m the one sending the Monday morning Fedexes. Sooner or later we will play ball. So give me a call.” You may choose to send a basketball by Fedex. Use a magic marker to write on it “Give us a shot.”

In the tenth week, call their secretary and find out their shoe size. Send one brand new shoe in a box with the following note: “I’m the one sending the Monday morning Fedexes. Now that I’ve got one foot in the door, call me.” The eleventh week, sent the matching shoe with the note: “I’m the one sending the Monday morning Fedexes. I know what you were waiting for to call me. You were waiting for the other shoe to drop. It just did.”

Marketing ideas that lead to more sales and bigger profits don’t have to be complicated or expensive. The key to this idea is to focus on 10 companies for the full 11 weeks. I’ve seen this one get great results!


10 marketing ideas.Marketing ideas lead to more sales and bigger profits when we personalize our phone messages. Let’s make your voice message, and that of everyone in your company, work for you by promoting what you do. To make you different, leave a message such as the following: “This is John. I’m busy helping a client (make more money, get more sales, etc.). Leave a message and I’ll call you back so we can do the same thing for you.” Show everyone that you are different, busy, successful, and ready to help them. Be sure to show enthusiasm when you leave these messages!


10 marketing ideas.Call together the CEO’s of your top 10 clients to a meeting at your office. Tell them how important they are to your company and how much you appreciate their business. Then tell them that, because they are important to you, you want to share some powerful marketing ideas with them that you believe could help them get more business. You begin by sharing these 10 marketing ideas. Hold another meeting three months later to see how people used the ideas.

Marketing ideas that lead to more sales and bigger profits can be as simple as making our most important clients feel important. People are as interested in us as we are in them. When they get a good idea from you, that makes them money, they will naturally want to help you get more business.


10 marketing ideas.Call together all of your employees for a Monday morning 29-minute update. Tell them how important they are to your company and tell them that you need their help. Ask the following: “If you were the CEO of this company, how would you lower expenses, improve productivity, and get more clients.” Make a big deal about any ideas that turn into productive action steps. As a point of respect, start referring to your employees as “Ladies and Gentleman”. Introduce new team members with a welcome poster on their first day and throw an ice cream social in their honor at lunch time. It will make them feel important.


10 marketing ideas.Marketing ideas lead to more sales and bigger profits when we hand out a very unique business card. Why not create a business card/brochure combination that can tell your company’s story in a very powerful way. Most business cards either end up in a pile or get tossed away.

The ZCard is a handy, compact, powerful marketing tool that is very effective in getting your message into the hands of potential customers. It can tell your story in a much better way and people tend to keep these because they are so unique. May I suggest that you never give out a regular business card again. These have been produced for Toyota, American Airlines, and Disneyland. You can get more information by going to


10 marketing ideas.Do not use note cards with your company logo. Get blank note cards with blank envelopes at a local drug store. They just might think that you picked up the card personally. Do not write a return address. I want to force people to open up your card. Use commemorative stamps to get more attention and hand-address the card. Write short note cards to your employees and to your clients. Tell them how important they are to you and how much you appreciate them. Send one note card a day, for 30 days, and see what happens. Adopt this motto: Never forget a customer; never let a customer forget you.

Marketing ideas that lead to more sales and bigger profits can be as simple as writing handwritten note cards to previous clients and see if you could bring them back. Tell them that you’ve been thinking about them and would like to get together for coffee or lunch.


10 Marketing ideas.Marketing ideas lead to more sales and bigger profits when we launch our own television network on the Internet. Create short, 2-3 minute videos that make you look like an educator in your field. Google your industry and find some interesting historical facts about your industry that will make people say, “Wow! That’s interesting.” That will get you a killer core story. Get a free YouTube Channel and post these videos there first and then on your website. Get a microphone and a cube, called a “microphone flag”, with your logo on it so you look like a network correspondent for your company’s own television network. You can get these at a local commercial audio store. Call your Internet television network your company name with the word “Nation” after it. Send e-mails to your entire database after posting each video and let them know about your latest “television report”.


10 Marketing Ideas.Marketing ideas lead to more sales and bigger profits when we have a strong USP. Create a unique selling proposition that stops people in their tracks when they ask you what you do. The aim is to get people to pay total attention for a few seconds so that they might tell others about your company. A good USP should be short, not logical, start with the word “We”, and include the word “You”. The line you’re filling in is: “We do ____________ for you.” Conduct a contest among your employees and put up some nice prizes. That will make them feel important.

Google your potential USP’s and see if anyone is using them. Even if they are, as long as it’s in another industry, and there would be no confusion, you can get it trademarked for yours. Do so with a good trademark attorney. Your USP should then be on everything – website, business cards, all advertising and it should be used when your receptionist answers your phone.


10 marketing ideas.Marketing ideas lead to more sales and bigger profits when we personalize our texts and e-mails. Other than family members, always use the other person’s first name and yours in all texts. Dale Carnegie, in the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, said that, to each of us, the most important thing in life is our name. When it comes to e-mail, always address people by name and change the subject line each time if it’s a series of e-mails in one day. Have a complete signature in all e-mails, including a street address and a phone number where they can reach you directly. If it doesn’t come as an attachment, add your picture to your signature. On the web, is a service that can make all of your company’s e-mail signatures the same.


All 10 of the above marketing ideas have been used by people in my audiences. Some have resulted in millions of dollars in profits. These truly are marketing ideas that lead to more sales and bigger profits!


“I use novel ideas that get attention and get me more sales!”

Related Article: Habits Need Changing to Get Us There

Get Motivated and Stay Motivated with a Championship Attitude.       Learn more about BoazSpeaker of the

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